Wishing story

There was a time when I truly thought that love just wasn't going to happen. It seemed I was not made capable of falling in love. I accepted it and it was easier that way. Then, my brother was about to get married. He had just come to this country and didn't have friends so there was no bachelor's party but on the night before the civil ceremony he came to my room with a beer in his hand, "Let's have a drink to my last night as a bachelor." So we did. We talked a bit and we are not a "talk about your feelings" type of family so it was refreshing. I asked him if he was sure he wanted to do it, he knew the girl for only 4 months! I always heard about people getting nervous, cold feet, second guessing, etc. But he answered, "I've never been more sure of anything in my life." I still had a hard time believing him even though he sounded sincere because since I never experienced love, I didn't understand it.

And then he said a pure heartfelt wish, "I wish that you find what I have. I wish you find love and happiness." 

In Polish culture we wish each other things all the time, birthdays, Christmas, New Year, name days, random occasions. I'm used to saying the words. I'm used to hearing them back but I never really believed in them. It's just words, after all. Words don't equal action. I'm a rational person, a realist by nature. Words come and go. A wish for health won't heal you. A wish for happiness won't mend your broken heart. A wish for prosperity won't put money in your wallet. I thought a wish was a useless social gesture to make people think you care.

So you can imagine that when my brother said that wish, I didn't think much about it. Even if wishes came true, this one was wasted on me as I was incapable of love. 

So he got married. It was middle of the week and we had only a celebratory dinner. They didn't want to do a proper reception until they got church wedding but just a dinner didn't sound like enough of a celebration. So they wanted to go to a dance club Saturday. I was invited and the bride's brother was invited. I wanted to go but did not want it to end up as a double date. I actually ended up in that situation just few weeks before for New Year's Eve party and it was very awkward. I can't explain it. It's like trying to connect two magnets by wrong sides. The opposite of "chemistry". So the only solution was to bring someone with me. Suddenly, my friendless life became an apparent problem. I looked through my contact list and found no candidates. There was no time to wonder how the hell it happened that I can't make friends. Tick tock tick tock. Two days only! Finally, I found a number. It was a guy I met in English class. We exchanged numbers in case if one of us was out and needed to know what the newest assignment was. I hadn't spoken to him in a year and worried if he still remembered me but this was a desperate time. I made the call and he did not have plans for Saturday. He came. Things happened that night. I felt things I did not think I was capable of. I fell in love. My brother's wish worked a miracle.

This changed my whole view of wishing. The whole "wish come true" idea we feed kids heads with is based on a wrong assumption. 

A wish must be given, not made. And it must be true. From heart to heart. True will, true spirit. Selfless and caring. Not just a recitation of a line that you think sounds good. It doesn't matter how badly it's said or if the person you're wishing it to listens. A true wish will see your heart and find a way.